A Eulogy Fit for an Eight-Legged Mindfreak

(background music)

A few months ago, I decided to write an entry about the wondrous mystery that was Paul the Octopus. Today, he has left for the great beyond to make predictions and eat his boxed meals for another Higher Power. His stay on Earth may not have been a welcome one for many soccer fans around the globe, but whatever he did...he was good at it.

There are some that say he might not have understood what was going on and just happened to be on the side of coincidence; others claim that he was proof that animals may have a conscience and liked to mess with people's minds. With the posters and other items that people brought to games during the World Cup, you could tell he was taken seriously by many fans. Let's not forget how big of a religion this sport is in many parts of the world.


...Obviously, he wasn't.

Maybe he didn't like the retirement? He didn't make the choice to retire, after all. This might have been his final resort to leave the cruel planet and continue his journey of predictions and unprecedented wisdom. Take it from me, it isn't all that fun when you can't speak out an voice an opinion sometimes. Then again, he may have been humbled by the zookeepers' needs to protect him from the critics and the fans that loved to hate him. Aside from those who hated him, the people around him knew how special he really was. They love him so much that they're going to cremate him--not serve him in a sushi bar. What he did during his short time on Earth may have been a fluke, but his caretakers and his visitors saw him as an animal with true grit with a load on the undersea brain.

I hope they have the fish he likes in the place where he's going to.
Soccer fans and commentators alike are going to miss this guy whether they liked or hated. Not because he was different, but he gave us more to ponder about, whether it was knowledge, premonitions, or even what we don't realize what we have until it's gone.

RIP Paul the Octopus (January 2008 - October 26, 2010)
I won't ever look at calamari the same way again.

--AZ